Welcome to the Hard Knocks Academy, also known as the School of Hard Knocks, where we take great pleasure in our ubiquitous reputation for our unpatented first-, second-, and third-degree BURN (Boldly Understood Recidivistic Neurology) programs, which have been particularly effective in helping those students who succumb to the temptation to goof off during class.

We hope that our Curriculum (amongst other things) will be of interest to you.

"Life is too short to be living somebody else's dream."
-- Hugh Hefner

"We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light."
-- Plato of Athens

"There is something fascinating about science; one gets such wholesale returns of conjecture out of such a trifling investment of fact."
-- Mark Twain, "Life on the Mississippi" (1883)